A Visit Avec Mom

Flew up CO and we boarded on time, sat on the tarmac for twenty for an engine check, and were off after that. Arrived twenty late due to late departure, but we had an unusual flight path right near Disney, so had a nice view of everything. Pilot was like twelve years old and that was disconcerting: mostly realizing he was old enough to be a pilot and I thought he was twelve.

The visit itself was fine. Straight to Mom’s to unload, then to TooJay’s for breakfast. Followed that with visit to BestBuy for surge protector, then to mall for a walk and peek into Barnes & Noble. After which she showed me her new office. Back to her house wherein I removed old surge protector, tagged all plugs, and installed it. Hung bracket for her. Removed some crap from her computer (Logitech camera crap). Watched some TV and then off to Haagen-Dazs then back to the airport.

Checked in AA and took a little walk around before going through Orlando’s glacial security lines. Got to terminal and found the AC was borked. Sweaty 1hr wait. I called Maury to say hi and she asked what all the noise was. I told her it was someone’s ill-behaved sprog. Eventually said sprog vanished and I went back to my book — a review when done: the book that should have been done before I made it home. (Foreshadowing).

Plane boards, I get an upgrade to the front due to full plane. I am thrilled. Then, to my dismay some very loud people sit across the aisle from me. Talk too loud. Using phone. They have two grandkids. One is sent to the back to sit with the parents. One (4 y/o?) stays up front with the grandparents. Kid is being loud and unruly all during ground time and am unable to read. He finally shuts up. I begin to read my book and the plane is en route.

Granddad asks flight attendant if he can bring the other grandkid (maybe 2?) to sit in the other empty seat. Flight attendant tells them no, it’s not allowed. Grandad argues that it’s a short flight and nobody will mind. Flight attendant says no. Flight attendant resumes duties. Grandparents argue with each other (loudly of course) that they should have done it without asking. Sprog mysteriously appears. Flight attendant has words with them, but they do nothing and finally flight attendant caves. Kids aren’t quiet. Another flight attendant takes pity on me because I am getting an earful, and pats me on the shoulder: we share an eye roll. Concentrating on book is difficult.

Ten minutes before landing they make the “all electronics off” announcement. The older kid starts throwing a temper tantrum like you haven’t seen and heard. It was impressive. The grandfather starts screaming at the kid to “shut up” and the sprog gets louder. The grandmother asks one flight attendant to tell the kid “that he can’t use his iPhone now, so just be quiet” because apparently they don’t want to do their job as (grand)parents. She refuses. Another flight attendant caves because there is about to be murder in the cabin.

Horrible flight. Not the fault of AA and I commend the flight attendants for putting up with it. If it was me, I’d have pushed the lot right out the fucking door. A reminder as to why I never, ever, no matter what, want kids. (Evan’s kids are some of the best behaved I’ve met in their age range, — but I love them to death so don’t take that as a knock.)

The flight arrived on time, and in a fit of spite, I blocked them in their row on landing and let the entire first class cabin off in front of me. I help everyone with their luggage and then pointedly leave the grandparents to fend for themselves. It served no purpose but to make me feel good. I feel bad for the people who were continuing on to Saint Louis with them.

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